The "semi-secret admirer" business is a bit of deadpan drollery, we hope.
Go have a look!
While you're at it, check out Marc's earlier El Naschie piece, How to Be a Science Journal Celebrity.
We once suggested that subscribers to El Naschie's apparently defunct Chaos, Solitons and Fractals could instead be sent Annals of Improbable Research or The Journal of Irreproducible Results and be none the wiser.
محمد النشائي All El Naschie All The Time محمد النشائى